Alextimia: What do you feel?

Alextimia: What do you feel?

Alextimia affects one in seven people worldwide, with a greater impact on males than females and have declined significantly in recent decades. For people suffering from this emotional disorder, it is impossible for them to identify their own feelings, as well as express them verbally.

The impossibility of expressing feelings, alextimia, has been officially described by the world of psychiatry as that disorder that suffers “a type of patients who give the impression of being different, strange beings that come from a completely different world from the rest, beings that live in the midst of a society governed by feelings ”.

It will be difficult for most to understand this disorder, but not to identify those people. They are usually intelligent people, well developed in technical and material matters although they have great difficulties to face their own emotions and understand the importance of others.

«The emotionally intelligent person has skills in four areas: identify emotions, use emotions, understand emotions and regulate emotions.»

–John Mayer-

What do you NOT feel?

Usually, a patient with alextimia is usually diagnosed with high-performance autism spectrum disorder (ASD), in many cases due to coincidences in the development. However, there are large differences between alexithymia and a person with Asperger syndrome. While the former is aware at all times of his lack of understanding of his own and others' feelings, the latter does not have to understand him.

In fact, many behaviors, including empathic behavior, can be understood and reproduced by the latter but you will never understand their true utility beyond rational application (if I give you words of encouragement, I will stop crying).

A person with alextimia has a double tendency to suffer from depressive disorders and, in many cases, depression can be covered by forced alextimia. The truth is that these individuals suffer in silence the total misunderstanding of themselves while the environment calls them selfish or indolent.

Its reality is limited by the inability to be sensitive and this translates into an inappetence at all levels since, how to choose what to do in the future if you do not even know what you want? How to have a relationship if when you think you know what you are looking for disappointment comes again and again because neither the other person understands nor is the couple understood?

6 alextimia markers

1. Inability to understand what you are feeling at a given time.

2. Disinterest in identifying the silences of others.

3. Impossibility of trusting others the most intimate of being.

4. Impossibility of finding underlying explanations in movies, music, etc.

5. Forced pragmatism: it is difficult to talk about one's own and others' feelings, so the person with alexithymia prefers to talk about everyday issues than feelings.

6. Confusion between the three negative feelings: fear, sadness, and anger.

Types of Alextimia

There are two different types of alexithymia. On the one hand, one can speak of primary alexithymia, which has a biological origin. It can occur as a result of some type of deficiency because, for example, there is a hereditary factor or because some neurological structures related to emotions have been damaged due to some disease.

On the other hand, there is secondary alexithymia, which occurs as a result of emotional trauma suffered both in childhood and adolescence and even in maturity.

Those who suffer from alexithymia are not only unable to recognize, interpret and express their emotions and feelings, but also to extract the valuable information they provide. There is still another effect of this disorder: who suffers it finds more difficulties when making decisions and relating.

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